Finals are over, so I now feel like I can write a post without shirking other duties! Also, I guess this serves as a warning to any guy who's thinking of asking me out (because I know there's a lot of them...just kidding).
First things first. I didn't decide overnight that I didn't want kids. There was a point where I strongly felt that my future husband and I would most certainly adopt. But I've come to realize something...I would be a terrible mother.
I don't babysit. Like, I've watched people's kids for a little bit and it goes ok. I've been a camp counselor for I-don't-know-how-many-summers and I can handle 5th-7th graders. Kind of. But I have never babysat children all day long. I feel super awkward when I hold babies. Watching me interact with kids is kind of like watching a grizzly bear paint its nails. Weird and messy and kind of unnatural. I just don't feel like I'm meant to have kids.
Now, I've heard it all before. "You'll change your mind when you're older." Well, I'm pretty stubborn and challenge acceptable. "You'll feel differently when you meet the right guy." Maybe my Mr. Right doesn't want kids either. You ever think of that?
This isn't just supported by my own feelings. I recently had a conversation with a friend about my not wanting to have kids. His response: "You don't really seem like the motherly type." His words, not mine. He also told me that most guys eventually want kids, so good luck ever getting married.
While we're on that subject...I think I'm actually ok with being single the rest of my life. I really don't think I'd mind that much. Do I make jokes about being single? Yes. Do I sometimes wish that I had someone to cuddle with and hold hands with? Someone to play with my hair? You bet. But really, what more do you need in life than Jesus and good friends? I've got both. Right now, a guy would just be an added bonus.
Note: this doesn't mean that I hate kids. Kids are great. Raising them is just not my cup of tea. I have friends that have super cute kids and I have even more friends that will one day get married and have their own super cute kids. And I wish them all the best of luck. I don't see myself joining that club. Like, ever. I'm cool with remaining a single pringle with a cat.
End of thought.
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